Monday, February 9, 2009
I can be an emotional person. I often tie lyrics of songs back to my life. Back to things I cherish and want to remember. Our song was on the radio yesterday. I used to listen to it. It fit the first few years of our life together so well. That song brought back memories of firsts. First meetings, first kisses, first I love you, first night together. It usually brings back memories of him holding me in his arms, swaying back and forth, the music the only thing we hear, swaying perfectly in tune with each other, but not at all in tune with the music. It usually reminds me of him. His smell. His arms. His eyes. Those things bring me hurt now. They make me cry, they make me wish we had that again. They make me fall deeper. I can't feel like that. I don't want to feel like that. I want to feel him, his arms, smell him, look into his eyes. But I can't. I don't know if I ever will again. I turned the song off. Then I threw away the CD.