Sunday, February 8, 2009
We have gotten very good at pretending. I don't think anyone knows what goes on behind closed doors. No one knows we don't speak to each other. No one knows I wait for him to leave before I get out of bed in the morning so I don't have to face him. No one knows we live a lie. I wonder how old the kids will be before they realize we never speak. We speak to the kids. We often speak through the kids. They are too young to realize they are the go between. I know it isn't right. I am sure he knows too. But we do. Why do we do it? I just don't know. Someday they will realize how life really is. Someday they will understand we are not one big happy family. I just hope we don't teach them our bad behavior. I hope they don't settle for life we have settled for. I hope they strive for better.